Friday 14 October 2011

Romantic Friday Writers - First Love


Hi all, I’ve been quiet on the blog for too long. In between trying to write book 3 of the Men of Valor series and completing line edits on Book 1 for a deadline on Sunday, I’ve come up for air. So you know I’m alive and well, albeit harassed.

This week the Romantic Friday Writers challenge is to post 400 words of flash fiction/excerpt/poem with the theme of First Love.

I am sharing a snippet from my second ever contemporary novel titled Reunited. This book is due out early next year – date to be confirmed. The story is in Lagos, Nigeria. This scene is part of the prologue. Ike Thomas, the hero, is a new graduate on youth service at Lara’s (the heroine) school as a geography tutor. Lara is a final year senior school student and develops a huge crush on him.

I’m sure a few of us can remember having crushes on young teachers at school. Well for Lara there’s a happy ever after, though it came ten years after this scene. I hope you enjoy this snippet.


Word count: 400
***
A few days later Lara walked into the class for her tutorial. Mr Thomas sat at the teacher’s desk. Her steps faltered, stopping just inside the doorway. Looking up, he smiled. Her heart rate took off on a sprint.

“Come in and sit down,” he said.

She could have sworn an angel had spoken to her, his deep voice rumbling through her. She wasn’t sure how she moved. Sitting down in front of him, she stared at him sheepishly, forgetting the reason she was there in the first place.

“You are...Lara Johnson?” He glanced at the sheet of paper with the list of names before looking at her again.
“Y-yes s-sir,” she stuttered, suddenly tongue tied.

“Relax, these sessions are informal. You can call me Ike instead of sir. Otherwise you make me feel like a fifty year old man with grey hairs. I don’t look that old, do I?” He smiled benevolently. She relaxed, a shy smile breaking out on her face.

“That’s better. You should smile more often.”

At his words, a warm glow spread through her body. There and then, she knew she was in love with him. It was crazy. Her first love. She read romance novels, had occasionally dreamt of being swept away by a dashing hero. Here he was in flesh not print. All he’d done was given her a compliment but he changed her world from that moment on. She swore she would do whatever it took to get him to notice her.

So she studied hard. Geography became her number one subject; she topped the class in all the tests. She lapped up everything that was thrown at her. Apart from holidays when she went home to see her sister and father, the only other thing she looked forward to was her afternoons in class with Ike.

All this time, he made no overt gestures towards her, simply remained the courteous, friendly and professional teacher to her mild irritation. Even when it was just the two of them sitting in the class room, he never said anything that could be misinterpreted as romantic. Still, she knew there was something between them. Each time he spoke to her, looked at her, she felt special, felt a bond between them that went beyond teacher-student. Even when she couldn’t see him, she felt his presence. She hoped one day he would say something to her.

***
Please share your thoughts/feedback. Don’t forget to stop by the other RFW entries for this week challenge by using thelink. Thank you.
Enjoy your weekend. 

28 comments:

  1. Ooh, best of luck with this and the Men of Valor books! This pupil and teacher crush/love story is lovely. I think many of us have harboured feelings for our teachers at some time (mine was a student teacher, long hair, guitar...)and your writing captured those emotions very tenderly. I felt her nervousness.

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  2. Margo, thank you. Yep, I certainly know girls in my old school that had crushes on young teachers. I went to an all girls school so you can imagine the rest. lol

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  3. Love that this was a GOOD student-teacher crush. Sometimes those can be great, and sometimes creepy.

    He sounds hot, and she sounds sweet, just want you want here.

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  4. I remember my own secondary school crush, lol..Look forward to reading Lara's story with her first love, she sounds like one determined lady :)

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  5. Beverly, can't have the hero creeping out the readers now, can I? Not in a sweet romance anyway. Lol

    Myne, those were the days, right? lol. Lara is determined but she might get more than she bargained for with Ike.

    Thank you both for stopping by.

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  6. Dear Kiru,
    Thank you for the compliment about my story-telling. I still have a long way to go though. Nice to have writing-pals along the way.
    Sounds like you have a lot of books on the way. Very exciting.

    Your snippet for 'First Love' is very good. I agree with Beverly, you got the student-teacher-relationship right.

    Makes me want to read the whole book! Do we get to see what happens years later?

    This is perfect for the theme 'First Love'. Innocent, sweet; and Ike cannot be anything than honourable or he'll loose his job!

    Well done!

    Best wishes,
    Anna
    For the benefit of other readers:

    Anna's RFWers' Challenge No. 23-'First Love'

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  7. Hi Anna,

    Thank you so much. I'm really glad you enjoyed it. It was important to get the right balance for the story despite Lara's frustration. Yes, we catch up with them years after their initial meeting in the story.

    I'm waiting to hear from the publisher about release date so hopefully you'll get to read the full story soon.

    Cheers,
    Kiru

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  8. Hi,

    Real first-time love crush! Nicely written, and good scene setting. Risque love affair coming up, obviously, in student tutor relationship. Ha ha. Plenty of tension no doubt as well. BTW: don't forget to pop it through the spell-checker before setting the ms free. ;)

    best
    F

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  9. Hi Francine,

    Yep, it's definitely risque. I'm glad you like it.
    The ms still needs to go through the editing process before it's ready for publication.

    Thanks for stopping by.

    Cheers,
    Kiru

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  10. I must admit, I was a little concerned because in the US it is such a touchy subject, teacher and student. It is true, we often admire teachers, the caution is when the teacher is inappropriate with a young person. However, you handled this with depth and feeling and reminded me of a crush I once had. I think you nailed it.
    Nancy

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  11. Hi Nancy, I did realise how touchy a subject this was when I started writing the story. I'm glad you think I nailed it. Thank you. :)

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  12. Hi Kiru!
    I never had a crush on a teacher. But in my senior year of high school, a friend of mine had a crush on our science teacher who was fresh out of college. They secretly dated. When she graduated he quit his job and took a position closer to where she was going to college. They got married two years later.

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  13. Hi Wendy,
    At least it worked out well for your friend. It doesn't always. I presume she was legal at the time it started.

    Thanks for stopping by.

    Cheers,
    Kiru

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  14. Nice one Kiru.
    Brings back memories of the only teacher I ever crushed on - Miss A-B. She was about 10 years older but she had such an impact on me, I'd flirt with her if I saw her today.

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  15. Hi Think-About-It, you never know. You might bump into her one of these days. lol

    Thanks for stopping by.

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  16. Kiru, you tackled a potentially inflammatory topic and dealt with it tenderly. All over the world, not just in the US, I'm sure teacher/student relationships are quite the no no. But most of us have been there. I remember quite the crush on a spunky science teacher when I was in Year Eight. Hmm. I can actually still remember him now. All part of our awakening, quite strong, and not easily forgotten. I love the way your character is so tentative. You've painted a true picture.

    It is such good news about your looming publication/s. Go girl! Keep us posted.

    Denise

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  17. Hello.
    This was a totally enjoyable read.
    It would be nice to see how this relationship develops over the 10 years she has to wait.

    This is indeed a touchy subject and one that seems to occur a lot...the outcome is usually not a happy one either.

    Lovely snippet, Kiru. I really like your writing style.

    I'm loving the new book cover too...it's hot!

    The Beauty Of Love

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  18. Ah, the teacher-student crush. I remember. It's a tough topic these days because of all the news stories that end badly. The other issue is the fact that the characters are not on a level playing field. The teacher has the power. Lots of things for you, the writer, to explore with this story.

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  19. Hi Denise,

    It was hard getting the right balance for this story but I'm glad you think I got it right. Thank you.

    Cheers,
    Kiru

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  20. Hi Andy, It's great to see you over here after such a long time. I'm glad you liked the snippet. Thank you for your kind words.

    Hi Scheherazade, the potential dynamics are varied. I hope I did the story justice. Thanks for stopping by.

    Cheers
    Kiru

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  21. Oh Kiru! I love this. Your story works so well with the teacher being laid back with the first name thing and at the same time minding his boundaries in class. You've given us a lovely snippet of the volcano of emotions as they develop in Lara, the young heroine. No doubt, we would get a picture of how Ike Thomas handles his private emotions too, in the book when it is published. (Or perhaps in a snippet like this, b4). Keep blazing interesting new trails, Kiru!

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  22. Hi Kiru,
    I love this and it makes me remember the good old days..... I had a crush on my geography teacher as well and it became my fav subject.

    Well done

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  23. Adura, thank you. It's a novel that grew from a short story idea I had last December. I'm certainly looking forward to getting it published.

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  24. Ayaba, geography teachers seem popular. lol. Thanks for stopping my. I'm glad you love it.

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  25. Hi Kiru. Back for my second read. Love it still..D

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  26. Oh yes I can remember my school crush! Eeek! I blush in horror remembering how I giggled and giggled every time this tall hunky blonde Dutch (from Holland, not Afrikaans)biology teacher came anywhere near me. Shame, he was very sweet and with hindsight I can see he handled it well. Strange think is I can't STAND blonde heroes in my romances! Go figure that out!! :)

    Judy, South Africa

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  27. Hi Denise, it's good to see you back for second helpings. :o)

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  28. Judy, it's great to read your account because it validates my story. Not all student-teacher crushes were predatory.
    Not sure what a psychoanalyst will make of you aversion to blonde heroes, though. LOL

    Thanks for stopping by.

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